


So It Goes Like This

by VixenRose1996



Series: So It Goes Like This: [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Black Maria speculation, Child Abuse, Dysfunctional Family, Everyone hates Orochi, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Kaido speculation, Orochi is a creep, POV Second Person, Present Tense, Yamato has some issues, Yamato speculation, but so does Kaido
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:14:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27040306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VixenRose1996/pseuds/VixenRose1996
Summary: Your name is Yamato, your father is a Yonko, and your life is hard.Or: An exploration of Yamato's first twenty-four years of life as the child of Kaido.Tears & Years (1/3)
Relationships: Kaido & Yamato (One Piece)
Series: So It Goes Like This: [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1938352
Comments: 6
Kudos: 45





	So It Goes Like This

**Author's Note:**

> I ask that you keep three things in mind while reading this:
> 
> 1) Even bad parents can love their kids.
> 
> 2) Almost no one has a child with the intention of being a crappy parent.
> 
> 3) While they may not deserve it, every parent wants their kid to love them.

So it goes like this:

You are three-years-old and your parents are a mother you know nothing about and a father who is a Yonko. You don't exactly know what that means but you understand that he is strong and scary. You understand that people fear and respect him in equal measure and that the people who follow Father are not your 'aunts and uncles', no matter what they say, but rather his underlings. 

Though you're still little you've come to understand that you are important because you are Father's only child and that most people in the world would prefer you dead or under their thumb so they could have a way to control your father. 

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are four-years-old and Father brings you a friend. Last month was your birthday and you’re playing with one of the gifts you were given: a chest full of beautifully handmade wooden creatures, at least thirty in total. So you’re making a koala do battle with a duck when you hear your father’s massive, thundering footsteps lumbering towards you. 

“Welcome home, Father,” you look up and say politely -after all, the man had been gone for five weeks this time so it was only appropriate to acknowledge his return- but don’t move to hug him. You’ve never hugged him and he’s never hugged you, why should this time be any different?

“Yamato,” he grunts out as a greeting, giving a stiff nod. “Did you have a good birthday?”

He wasn’t there, so it makes sense he would ask. 

It was a nice birthday. You’d been positively spoiled with treats and gifts by Father’s servants and subordinates. It had taken you nearly an hour to unwrap all of your gifts, mostly because people kept reminding you to tell your father that they’d given it to you.

“Yes, Father. The chefs made a bunch of yummy food and I got a lot of neat…”

You trail off as you notice a girl about your age peaking out from behind Father’s leg. She’s tall, taller than you even, wearing an ill-fitted black dress with messy blonde hair, a reddish mark across her neck, and, most surprising, a pair of horns growing from her head. 

Just like you and just like Father.

_‘Do I have a sister?_ ’ you wonder as Father steps to the side and nudges the girl forward. He is gentle with her, as much as the man ever could be gentle with anyone. She doesn't immediately go flying forward and through a wall though, which shows your father is being at least somewhat careful with his monstrous strength. 

“This is Maria,” he says simply. “She is going to be your friend now. I’m having a room made up but you should show her around before dinner.”

With that, Father lumbers away and leaves the two of you alone to stare at one another in silence. Well, you stare, the girl… Maria stares at the floor and you notice that she is shaking ever so slightly. 

“Are you cold?” you ask, unaware of your own innocence. 

Maria shakes her head but keeps her mouth shut. 

_‘She must be shy,’_ you decide with a frown. Turning back towards your creature collection, you scan them and carefully select the prettiest, most elaborate one. 

Holding out the painted dragon, you smile as sweet as you can and ask, “Do you want to play with me?”

Maria is startled by your question and she looks at you like she is wondering if you’re teasing or testing her. You’re not though and keep holding out the toy, waiting until…

“Yes, thank you,” she whispers and hesitantly reaches out to take the dragon.

It is the start of the first friendship, real or not, that you ever have.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are five-years-old and you're not sure you love your father. Perhaps that isn't a surprise, Father isn't a very lovable man; he is rough and angry and always smells like alcohol and you never remember him hugging you or saying that he loves you. 

Still, Father sometimes lets you hang from his horns or perch on his shoulder while he is working. Sometimes he brings you back gifts from his travels; typically small, odd little curiosities that he suspects will catch your interest. Sometimes he takes you flying in his dragon form over the endless seas and strange lands. 

During these times, you think that there may be something worth loving about your father after all.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are six-years-old and don’t know much about the world but you know this Roger that Father keeps talking about must be important. After a month of hearing his name, you finally ask your father who he is.

“The Pirate King,” he explained. “A man strong enough to die on his own terms and shake this weak world to its core.”

“Oh,” you replied. After all, you are just a little kid and such things aren’t all that important to you. 

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are seven-years-old and someone tries to kill you for the first time. He creeps into your bedroom while you are asleep but, thankfully, they are the sloppiest would-be assassin in the world, and, when they try to stab you in the throat, they miss. 

You wake up to the feeling of a knife's blade cutting down your cheek. It hurts and you're _scared_ so you **scream** like you've never screamed before but no one is there so you are on your own. 

It's dark and you kick out at them; even at your young age you're as tall as some adults and your kick breaks the man's nose, knocking some teeth out in the process. 

The man falls to the ground, cursing and holding his bloody face as you scramble away and watch on, terrified. But then you hear thundering footsteps of your father approaching and you both freeze. Sure enough, Father's massive form bursts through the door -completely destroying it in the process- and grabs your attacker by the head, crushing it like a grape. Blood and brain spray everywhere, oozing between your father's fingers and onto the floor, and you start crying.

Father doesn't say anything to comfort you but he does pick you up in his non-bloody hand, holding you to his massive chest, and carry you to his private quarters. You don’t particularly want to be with him right now, would honestly prefer running to Big Sis Maria for comfort, but you can’t say that through your tears so you just keep crying. 

Father drops you onto his bed that smells like sake and then silently stands guard until you eventually fall asleep. 

The next morning, Father takes you out to an empty field, gives you a _kanabo_ -so small that it looks like a toy compared to his- and says that it is time to start your training.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you witness the most amazing thing in the world. You see the great Kozuki Oden hold his beloved retainers above the boiling oil for an hour and save their lives. Then you see him die, you see your father kill him. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you realize that Father is a **Bad Man**. 

Not just a scary man. Not just a harsh man. He is a **BAD MAN**. 

Following Oden's dead body sinking into the oil, you’re whisked away and confined to your bedroom for the next three days.

No one tells you anything but by pressing your ear to the wall, you can listen and learn about the burning of Kuri Castle, the disappearance and presumed deaths of the Nine Red Scabbards, the missing Lord Momonosuke and Lady Hiyori, the death of Lady Toki.

And it breaks your heart.

For all your father's roughness and harshness in training, you've always lived a comfortable life. You're not exactly doted on or spoiled, but you have plenty of food and nice clothes and people serve you tea and meals with a smile on their faces. You can't remember life before Wano and have never questioned things before but now you hate this life.

In those three days, you weep in sadness for the lives lost. In those three days, you seeth in anger at your father and Lord Orochi; you hate them for their greed and evil, for how they've killed good people and corrupted a beautiful land. In those three days, you become inspired.

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and the morning you are finally let out of your quarters you use the chaos still going on to sneak away from Onigashima, hiding away on a small boat heading toward Kuri and sailing over with the crewmates.

You’re almost discovered twice, but that is neither here nor there. 

Kuri is a mess, buildings are destroyed and large stretches of lands burned, and the people are in mourning. You want to help them, somehow, but for now, you can only be grateful that no one looks twice in your direction.

You arrive at the ruins of Kuri Castle, the smell of smoke still pungent in the air, and manage to sneak past the guards that have been placed around the perimeter. For the next few days, you dig and sort through the rubble looking for... something. 

It's hard work; you breathe in ash and hurt your hands on pieces of wood that still have heat and ragged nails sticking out of them. You're dirty and tired and hungry and thirsty and your eyes are burning from the lingering smoke. But, eventually, you dig deep enough to reach the remains of a sub-basement and you find a small chest made of hard, cold stone. 

In it, there is a book.

In it, there is a legacy. 

In twenty years’ time, someone would come to exact vengeance on Orochi in Oden's name and open the borders of Wano Country. You decide right there and then you will help them.

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and there is great relief among the Beast Pirates when you show back up on Onigashima. You disappearing must have caused upset among the ranks and you hope your father didn't lose his temper on some poor underling. Everyone is so happy to see you that no one comments on your dirty, disheveled appearance or ask where you have been. Instead, your attendants just get you some food, draw you a bath, and put out some clean clothes. 

When they leave, you spend a solid hour hiding Oden's journal, moving it from place to place until settling on wedging it between the wall and your dresser. It's not perfect, but it will do for now. 

After getting cleaned up, you march right up to Father and declare that you want to Kozuki Oden. 

It doesn't go well. 

You wake up two days later in the infirmary of the mansion covered in bandages and with every single muscle in your body still throbbing in agony. Father, though he won't be called that for long, had allowed your wounds to be treated but not your pain, doubtlessly believing that every hurt would be a reminder to you.

Your father is sitting by your bedside when you wake up, staring at an even more intense version of that confused, questioning look that he has always looked at you with. He doesn't seem angry, exactly, which is a sharp contrast to the seething rage you glare at him with. 

"Why?" you hiss, ribs aching with every breath. 

"You were being foolish," Father replies simply. "I was correcting your behavior."

His blatant dismissal hurts more than just about everything else and angry tears pool at the corner of your eyes. 

"You're a monster," you cry. "If you won't let me be Oden then I'm going to leave; I'm going to leave and you'll _never_ have to see me again!"

It was that declaration that finally sparked a reaction in your father. His face twists in anger and he pulls his hand back to hit you, then everything goes dark once more.

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you wake up in the infirmary yet again in even more pain with your father still sitting by your side. You don't notice this immediately though, because the first thing you do is try to rub the aching bruise on the side of your face only for the rattling of chains to catch your attention. Around each of your wrists is a metal cuff with several links of chain hanging down; they're not particularly heavy and don't do much to restrict your movement but you still wonder why they are there. 

You don't have to wonder for long though.

"Because of your idiocy, I have been forced to take action," Father growls, startling you and causing you to flinch away from him. "If you even try to leave Onigashimi then those cuffs will explode. If you even try to leave Onigashimi then you will die."

Your blood runs cold and your heart freezes in your chest. The thought that Father wouldn't, _couldn't_ , kill you immediately flies through your mind. After all, despite his harshness, his distance, and his anger he is _still_ your father, and, despite everything, you've never doubted that he cared for you. But now the cold look in his eyes makes you question that for the first time in your life.

"Why?" you blubber, the tears coming freely now. "Why not just let me go?"

"Because you are my child," Father explains coldly, "and I will not let you leave me."

Head pounding, eyes flowing, nose dripping, and body sore, you look up at this harsh, cruel man you've spent the past eight years calling 'Father' and you feel real **HATE** for the first time. 

"I **_hate_ **you," you declare. "I'm going to become Kozuki Oden and then, one day, I see to it that Wano's borders are opened to the world, just like he dreamed!"

The monster above you just grunts and turns to leave, "Then you better focus on getting stronger so you can defeat me. We resume your training first thing next week, make sure you're ready."

Then he is gone and all you can do is just curl up on your side, desperately trying to stop your tears. 

Later on, Big Sis Maria will come to stoke your hair and give you a hug. She’ll tell you that Kaido just wants what is best for you and you’ll know that you cannot trust her anymore. Just as Father has become Kaido, Big Sis Maria becomes Black Maria. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you hate your father with most of your heart.

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you mentally start thinking of 'Father' as 'Kaido.'

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you inherit a dream.

***

So it goes like this:

You are eight-years-old and you are alone.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are nine-years-old and you've come to hate your reflection. 

It's not so much that you hate your appearance exactly. You like your warm amber eyes and you like the shade of your skin -note as dark as Kaido's but darker than, say, ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria- and you like your long, tan blonde hair that turns to black at the ends. You like that you are tall, already taller than most of the servants in Kaido's castle, and you like your still-growing horns that start off dark gray near your skull only to gradually fade pale near the tips. You even like the callous on your hands.

But the fact remains, you look like Kaido. 

And you _hate_ that. You **hate** that you look like a man who has caused so much pain and suffering to so many, including yourself. You **hate** that, when you look Kaido in the eyes, you see your own. You imagine that, in a decade or two, these similarities will only increase until people stare at you with the same type of awe or terror that they do him and you **hate** that thought. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are nine-years-old and, one day, while recovering from a busted arm given to you in a sparring match, you are forced by Kaido to attend a play held in his 'honor.' Not that he pays enough attention to enjoy it, with how much Kaido is drinking. 

Still, you like it well enough, taking deciding that, just for tonight, you can relax enough to enjoy the music and the costumes and the story with its themes of honor and loyalty. The masks worn by the actors particularly fascinate you with their exaggerated painted features and long, wild hair. They look fierce and otherworldly, like nothing could harm them and everything should fear them.

Your interest must have been plainly obvious because even in his drunken stupor, Kaido recognizes it. 

" _Oni_ and _Hannya_ masks," he grunts out as an explanation. "Male and female demons."

" _Hmmm_ ," you hum, eyes still fixed to the stage before you. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are nine-years-old and you sneak backstage for the play and you swipe the first _hannya_ mask you see. You tuck it under your clothes and smuggle it back to the mansion. Its wooden edges press against your stomach and the fake heart of the wig tickling the inside of your thighs but, thankfully, it stays in place. It makes your gait awkward as you walk alongside Kaido back to the place you are forced to call home but he makes no comment of it.

Instead...

"Did you enjoy the play?" Kaido asks out of nowhere and completely out of character.

When you finally get over your surprise at such a question, you have to admit that, "Yes, it was nice."

The next morning you wear the mask to breakfast. It is far from perfect; the eyeholes don't quite line up, it is kind of hard to breathe, and it is too big for your face. Still, when you arrive in the dining hall, the servants and Kaido's subordinates look at you uncertainly but your father just rolls his eyes, scoffs, and calls for his first drink of the day.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are ten-years-old and the forests of Onigashima have become your place of peace. Kaido has become increasingly fanatic about your training ever since your last birthday, so most of your days are spent covered in bruises and in pain. When you can, so sneak off into the woods to track animals and climb trees to look across the ocean towards the horizon and try to ignore how lonely you feel. In the shadows of the trees, listening to the birdsong, you can almost relax.

One day, you are walking through the forest when the dirt under your feet crumbs aways and you fall into an underground cave. The cavern is not large, the natural rock ceiling is only a couple of feet above your head but is longer and wider than even your bed chamber back at the mansion. 

When you finally blink the dirt out of your eyes, you look around the cave, dimly light up but the rays of sunlight that come through the hole you've fallen through and think, _'I can work with this.'_

Sure the cave is filled with dirt and bugs and leaves, but it has potential! It is private and secluded and could yours! With some work, this could become your real home, this could become a place of safety and silence. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are ten-years-old and you've spent the past nine months getting your secret cave home in order. Stealing building supplies and sneaking out when you can, you install a wooden hatch door in the 'roof' then clean out the dirt, bugs, rocks, and leaves to the best of your ability. You cover the hard stone ground in old rugs and use railroad spikes to hang thick canvas tarps to cover the ceiling and walls of the carven. Add a couple of hanging lanterns to illuminate the darkness and things truly start coming together. 

Once it is cleaned up, you filled it with books, sealed barrels of clean water and jars of preserved food, little trinkets that managed to make you smile, objects from Oden's reign that Orochi hadn't gotten around to destroying, and whatever bits of the outside world you could steal from Father's private quarters. You store Oden's journal here, locked up tight in a fire-proof locked box for safe-keeping. The cave becomes your sanctuary, the one place of peace you could get whilst stuck under Kaido's thumb. 

You manage to drag a futon into the cave after much pushing and shoving along with some blankets and pillows. One day, when Kaido is in a particularly foul mood, you stay overnight in your sanctuary and it is the first time you've slept through the night in as long as you can remember. 

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are twelve-years-old and things are getting worse around you. Wano is suffering and people are _dying_ under Orochi, who doesn't seem to care so long as he can continue to play at being Shogun; Kaido doesn't care either, so long as there are people to work in his factories and money to fund his most recent project. Even when he is on Onigashima -and he often isn't these days- his attention is usually elsewhere so the less disciplined of his subordinates take the opportunity to run amok. 

They attack villages and harass women, they hurt people and there really isn't anything you can do. Sure, you can leverage your position as Kaido's only child and heir to your advantage when need be but, when possible, you prefer to rely on your own strength rather than your name. 

"Let her go right now!" you demand, glaring down one of the newest members of the Beast Pirates. He is some sort of lizard zoan who smells like garbage and doesn't look much better with the personality to match his apperance.

"Or what?" the man scoffs, tightening his grip on the hair of a scared girl only a year or two older than you. Then he gives you a disgusting grin as he eyes your body which is just beginning to develop, "Maybe we can make a deal, huh? You can take her place and I-"

You break his jaw, nose, elbow, six fingers, left knee, and two ribs then leave him to suffer in the dirt. You personally escort the still-terrified girl back to the docks and order an underling to safely return to her home, adding in a valuable golden ring in addition to a stern threat as an incentive to do the job properly. 

Then you have to watch the little boat sail away and desperately wish you could be on it too. Instead, you have to settle for hoping you achieved freedom for someone else even when you cannot have it for yourself. 

A few days later, ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria will assure you the girl got back to her village safely, along with a bit of 'compensation' for her troubles. Then she gives you back the golden ring and mentions giving the zoan a beating of her own -Kaido has had her trained well and she is _far_ more receptive to his efforts than you are- for his, 'disgusting actions.'

"Your father will be hearing about it too," the older girl says. "I'm sure he'll want to administrate his own punishment when he returns."

You snort and roll your eyes, "Yeah, I'm sure he'll be _really_ bothered by it."

~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria gives you a sad frown. "I know you think he is a monster but even your father has a code."

_'A code that doesn’t include killing an innocent man, helping a disgusting snake destroy a country, or imprisoning his own child,'_ you think bitterly. But you give your former best friend a shrug and she thankfully drops the subject, leaving you with the gold ring and your thoughts. 

Two weeks later, Kaido has returned and, when you take a break during a training session, asks if you really attacked one of his subordinates. 

"Yes," you growl, jutting your chin out definitely. "I won too, beat him bloody."

To your surprise, Kaido lets out an amused huff. "Good. You've gotten stronger."

You grow warm and your eyes go wide at the unexpected praise, ducking your head to hide the smile on your face. But then the short break ends and Father is particularly brutal during the rest of training to remind you of how weak you still are. 

The next day, Father kills the lizard zoan and leaves his broken, bloodied body in the center of Onigashima for three days as a warning. A warning to what isn't specified but news of the man's behavior and your defeat of him spread through the island like wildfire. 

After that, you command a bit more respect and fear among the newer and weaker members of the Beast Pirates. 

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are thirteen-years-old and things are getting worse inside of you. The days creep by painfully slow and too fast all in one as you watch people suffer, unable to do anything. The days creep by and you never seem to get any stronger; your sparring sessions with Kaido never go anywhere, he still beats you to the ground then orders you patched up. It... _you_... never get any better.

But worse than that is the loneliness. Never in your entire life did you ever remember not being lonely. Things were better back when you were naive about Kaido & his crew's true nature and still happily played with ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria, back when you were still openly doted on by various servants and attendants. 

Now you have no one. 

Of course, part of that is your own fault; after all, you have spent the past five years pulling away from just about everyone you've ever known. But the fact remains, you have no mother, no father, and no friends. Kaido's subordinates respect you to a certain degree because of your position and strength but they did not like or understand you, nor did they ever honestly try. The servants obey you too but... what else could they do?

As for the other citizens of Wano? 

Well, even if you could get close to any of them, why would they be friends with the child of a man... a _monster_ who'd help to ruin their country? Perhaps things had been different before Kaido had brought you to this land but that was so long ago that you couldn't remember it. 

You sleep more often in your sanctuary and most nights you find yourself crying. The one comfort you have is the memory of the lengths Oden had gone through to protect his family, people, and retainers; it gives you strength and a purpose beyond what Kaido wants for you -whatever that is, you still aren't sure. The man's journal becomes your bible. You read the words over and over again until they became lullabies to dreams of a Wano that was open to a world that was big and more amazing than you could ever imagine. 

When you sleep, you dream of a day in fifteen years when someone would arrive to save Wano from Orochi and Kaido. 

You dream of a day you can be free.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are fourteen-years-old and forced to attend an official breakfast with Kaido, the highest-ranking members of the Beast Pirates, and Orochi. You'd done your best to slip away before the start of the whole damn mess but ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria had caught you trying to climb out a window, causing Kaido to snatch you up in one massive fist and physically carry you to the dining hall as you struggle like a naughty kitten.

The food is delicious, a spread fit for a king - _'or a Shogun,'_ you think bitterly- with large trays of eggs with _furikake_ , miso soup, grilled fish, and so much more, but it all tastes like ash in your mouth. You eat because you need your strength but can barely keep any of it down. Partly because all you can think about is how this food was snatched from the mouths of starving Wano citizens, of starving **_children_** , and partly because of how Orochi is looking at you. 

You've always hated the way he's looked at you... 

When you were very small, he used to look at you like you were an opportunity, doubtlessly thinking there was a way he could use you to control Kaido. At one point, you even overheard from Beast Pirates that Orochi had offered to 'foster' you in the Flower Capital. An offer that your father had apparently harshly refused with the warning to never bring it up again. 

Then you got a little older and, after watching you kick one of his guards clear across the training field and straight through a brick wall, he looked at you with fear. That made you feel better; it served as a reminder of how much of a coward the snake really was. 

But, ever since your body started to change, he's looks have become more... _fascinated_. The loose-fitting sleeved kimono, hakama pants, and large _nio-daisuki_ you've taken to wearing are in honor of the Great Lord Oden, but it would be a lie to claim that you didn't like how they conceal your developing figure. You also like how it makes Orochi look at you with more disgust than interest. The first time he saw it, the bastard was so spitting mad he fell right over and spilled hot tea on himself while everyone watched on, completely unimpressed.

That was a _good_ day. Anything that makes Orochi unhappy makes you smile. 

Today though, Orochi has decided to say something. 

"You need to get your kid in line, Kaido," the bastard whines, waving a hand in your direction. "She can't be running around dressed like... **_that!_ **"

The dining hall goes silent, all eyes turning to you, Orochi, and Kaido. They are waiting to see what happened, to see what Kaido would say. It's not like no one else has noticed who you are dressed like but your father has yet to speak on the subject and they all know better than to bring it up. If nothing else, most of them -at least the ones likely to survive being in the Beast Pirates- know their place.

But, oddly enough, Kaido says nothing and instead just eyed Orochi with a look of utter annoyance as he put down his sake -he only on the first bottle of the day, which means Father was still fairly clear-headed... But was that a good thing or a bad thing?- to grab a plate of grilled fish. 

Orochi doesn't take the hint that this wasn't a topic Kaido was interested in discussing though, stupidly continuing on even as you and many other members of the Beast Pirates glare daggers at him. 

"She's getting up there in age, right? Maybe it's time to find her a hus-"

**_WHAM!_ **

Kaido slams a fist down on the dining table -thankfully not breaking it; they'd already lost three this month and it is hard to make a table big enough to fit Father and his calamities- and everyone jumps before going perfectly still. The entire hall held its breath, waiting to see what the Strongest Creature would do. 

Would he rage? Would he weep? Would he decide to beat you publically?

"The discipline of **_my_ ** child is **_my_ ** responsibility and **_my_ ** responsibility alone," Kaido growls viciously, fixing Orochi a darker look than he's ever given you. "You do **_not_ ** insult my child. You do **_not_ ** comment on their appearance. You do **_not_ ** touch them. You do **_not_ **address them directly. And, if you try anything..."

He trails off, letting the blatant threat hang in the air. Orochi swallows hard and quakes, the fear causing him to break out in a thin layer of sweat. He says nothing but gives a wobbly nod and ducks his head, returning to his meal; the obvious deferment signals to everyone that the stand-off is over and they no longer have to worry. 

Father lets out a long, annoyed sigh and takes another drink of his sake. He says nothing to you but you find yourself ducking your head as a smile creeps its way onto your face. 

Your father is not a good man and you're not even sure that he loves you but, if nothing else, this is reassurance that Father wouldn't let anyone else control you.

You are his child, no one else's. 

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are fifteen-years-old and, for the first time, you land a hit on Kaido during a training session. 

It's basically a total fluke, a move made on pure instinct. You've been training all morning, you're sore and tired, and you see Kaido swing downward so, without thinking, you twist toward your father and smash your _kanabo_ against the inner side of his right knee. 

It's a hard blow, thrown with your full strength, but it only makes Kaido wobble slightly. Still, the mere fact that you landed a hit at all is enough to have you both freeze. Kaido blinks down at his ripped pant leg, dumbfounded, as you freeze, replaying what just happened in your head.

Before you can say anything, Father gives a rough-looking half-smile and grunts, "Good."

Then he proceeds to beat the crap out of you for the rest of your training session but, even though it's probably just your imagination, you could swear he's a bit gentler than usual. And if it seems like all of your favorite foods are served with dinner that night, well, that is probably your imagination too. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are fifteen-years-old and waiting in the infirmary to get the all-clear from the mansion's private doctors. Kaido is sitting in the corner watching the physicians work silently, as he always was whenever he carried you back from the training fields to be patched up. 

You grind your teeth and look anywhere but at him, an action that accidentally causes trouble from the poor nurse who is trying to check your eyes to make sure you don't have a concussion. This habit annoys you because it is a sign that your father cares about you and that makes it **hard** to hate him as much as you _should_. 

"Is that all?" you ask the doctor bandages your ankle. "Can I go now?"

The doctor shifted awkwardly, shyly looking over to Kaido who still says nothing, before clearing his throat and saying, "Yes, you should be fine, Young Master Yamato, just so long as you take it easy for the next couple of days."

As soon as the man is finished, before you can even respond, Kaido stands and leaves the room without a word. 

As usual. 

"Thank you for all of your help," you say politely. You always try to be polite to those who serve your father, such a life can't be easy. 

"Of course, young master, it was my pleasure," the doctor replies with a bow.

_'I'm sure it was,'_ you think sourly.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are sixteen-years-old and Kaido welcomes a new member into the fold. At first, you just observe him from a distance, only half-interested; after all, many 'promising' new recruits don't last beyond the first month under your father's 'training' so there is no need to get invested in this guy just yet. One thing sticks in your mind though.

"A fishman who ate a Devil Fruit, that is rare," Kaido commented between big swallows of sake and mouthfuls of grilled fish. "Most don't want to give up their ability to swim."

" _Hmmm_ ," you replied absentmindedly, too busy polishing your _kanabo_ to pay much attention. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are sixteen-years-old and, three months later, the newbie is still here. In fact, he has been climbing the ranks at an alarming rate and you've heard ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria speculate that he'll make Tobi Roppo soon. She would know, your childhood friend had gracefully accepted the title on her last birthday. 

You still don't know his true name, nor do you particularly care to, but he's going by Pitch now, a name that will certainly change as he climbs that ranks of the Beast pirates. You've found out his ability though, he ate the Zou Zou no Mi, Model: Mammoth and that was actually pretty interesting, even if nothing else about him was. 

Kaido doesn't agree with you on that though, he seems keenly interested in the young fishman. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are sixteen-years-old and it's time for another training session, this one is different though.

"What is he doing here?" you ask... well, you demand, jabbing a finger at Pitch who shifts uncomfortably. 

Kaido scoffs at your tone. "He's going to be your training partner for today."

"What?"

Sparring sessions have always, for better or worse, ben 'family time.' Sure, there were instances when others - ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria or one of the All-Stars- would come and watch you train over the years. Kaido also likes to make the occasional public spectacle of you beating the tar out of some uppity, unruly underling. You hate the way he feels entitled to use you to make an example.. but you also understand and even, sickeningly, agree with his reasoning. 

Regular demonstrations of your strength, of your fighting prowess, serves as a reminder of how powerful you are and, consequently, how powerful he is. For you, it serves as a way to ensure the majority of the underlings respect you. That respect, that fear, gives you a whole other type of power. 

"He is the same age as you," Kaido grunts, seemingly feeling more indulgent than usual. "I want to see how Pitch here measures up to you."

So the two of you fight, because what else can you do? Deny Kaido?

It's a good battle, all things considered. It's always interesting to fight against a new opponent with a unique fighting style; it's an excellent way to learn and get stronger for when the time comes.

The fight drags on for at least a few hours until the pair of you become locked in a stalemate, _kanabo_ and tusks locked together as you both brace against the ground and push with all your might. 

"So you're Master Kaido's heir, huh?" the mammoth asks, grunting under the strain of their clash. "It must be amazing to be trained personally by him. I can't imagine-"

**_WHAM!_ **

You jump back from Pitch, using the element of surprise to swing up with all your might. Your _kanabo_ connects with the underside of his chin and the blow sends him flying across the training field, his massive mammoth for rolling to a stop as he shifts back to his regular self. 

After a few long moments of heavy, pained panting, Pitch stands once more -one hand gripping his bleeding jaw- and turns to your father. 

"Please forgive me, Master Kaido," he pleads pitifully. "I'm sorry for being so weak. I will do better, I swear! I will-"

Kaido holds up a hand to cut him off. "You are not weak, Pitch. This battle speaks only of Yamato's strength, not any weakness on your part."

"Th-thank you, Master Kaido," Pitch all but cries as blood drips down the side of this face into the dirt. "Young Master Yamato is very strong indeed, skilled too."

"Of course," Kaido nods smugly. "As expected of _my_ child."

Despite the compliments -do they count as compliments if not said to you directly?- you frown. Usually, it makes you smile when your father says something nice about you, however small or indirectly, but there is no joy in this confirmation of your ability as a warrior. 

Did the years of blood, sweat, tears, and pain you put into developing your skills count for nothing? Is the only reason you are strong because of who your father is? Sure, the man was your primary teacher and most of the techniques you know are his but you've still spent nearly every day for at least half of your life working to become better and stronger. Does all that effort mean nothing to others?

"Are we done here?" you growl. 

Maybe Kaido is feeling generous after your good showing on the training field or maybe he just doesn't want to deal with your attitude because the Yonko just waves you away with a grumble. Not one to look a gift horse in the way you go. It's a decent walk through the streets of Onigashima from the training fields to your sanctuary, but that just gives you time to think. 

Swinging your _kanabo_ back and forth, you mull over your anger and annoyance at who Pitch and Kaido had said. Why did it bother you so much? Is it just because of the reminder that, in so many ways, you still rely on your father? Or is it just because Kaido seemed to be nicer to his new young subordinate that he'd ever been to you? 

Did Kaido see Pitch as the ideal son? The young fishman was obedient, adoring, and unflinchingly loyal, after all. He was even the same age as you. 

Something wet and warm hit the top of your foot, causing you to look down. 

Blood.

A splatter of blood still clung to your _kanabo_ , your swinging of the weapon flinging it around. 

_'Pitch's blood,'_ you realize, running your thumb over one of the _kanabo's_ deadly spikes. _'I could have really hurt him.'_

A realization hits you like a charging elephant (or woolly mammoth, as the case may be), and you march right into the shop of the first blacksmith you can find. 

"Y-young Master Yamato," the man sputters as you drop your _kanabo_ onto the counter. "H-how may I serve you?"

"The spikes, I want them gone," you demand. Later you'd feel bad about forgetting your manners -it's not like you enjoyed the fact people were scared of you and usually try to counter their natural fear of you by being as polite as possible- but, in the moment, it was the only way you could think of to get what you wanted.

"W-what?"

"The spikes," you repeat. "File the spikes down. I'll pay whatever you want, just get it done immediately."

"O-of course."

As the blacksmith struggles to lift your _kanabo_ , you bitterly think to yourself, _'I will never be like Kaido.'_

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are seventeen-years-old and it's your birthday once more. Generally speaking, this should be a big day; you are now officially of age, after all. Under different circumstances, this would be the day you got your first ship, your first crew, and your first command post. Today would be the day you set out on your first real adventure. 

But circumstances aren't different, the cuffs are still on your wrist and you still can't leave Onigashima. So, instead, Kaido just throws you a 'grand banquet' that you are not sneaky enough to avoid having to go to. 

So you have to sit and act grateful as piles of food and gifts are placed in front of you by individuals hoping to gain your father's favor. They smile and throw slimy compliments your way and overall act like major boot-likers while they side-eye Kaido, trying to gauge his reaction to whatever trinkets they're presenting. 

Despite all of this, you still try to be grateful, you still smile back and say 'thank you' for every gift. You might not like that people want to use you to gain favor with your father... but you also hate that they innately fear you simply because you are the child of Kaido.

Of course, this also means you have to smile and say thank you to people you absolutely loathe.

"Thank you, Lord Orochi," you say through the fakest, most forced smile anyone has ever seen as you hold up the kimono he's gifted you. "This is quite beautiful."

To be fair, the kimono was lovely. It was made from rich, midnight-blue silk with cherry blossom trees silk-screened on. If you were to put it on, you're sure it would lay elegantly on your body, perfectly complementing every curve and muscle. It even looks tailored to fit your height. If you wore it, you'd probably look like a picture of sultry beauty and grace, which is certainly Orochi's intention. 

The snake wanted you to look like a courtesan instead of the fighter you are. 

_'Fuck you too, you traitorous bastard,_ ' you think, the false smile still fixed on your face as Orochi prattles on about something. _'I can't wait for the day someone removes your smug, ugly head.'_

Both Orochi's simpering and your own disdainful thoughts are cut off by your father's disgusted growl. A curious look reveals that the subject of the yonko's ire is, strangely enough, a letter presented to him by a frightened attendant. 

Deciding to tempt it, you scooch closer to get a better look. There is a smell that wafts from the cute pink envelope that is almost disarmingly sweet, like vanilla and caramel. From where you are seated, you can see the letter itself written in exquisite cursive lettering with gold and silver ink on thin, delicate paper. But despite being such an innocent-looking item, the envelope and its contents managed to put an even-more-sour-than-usual expression from Kaido’s face.

"Is Linlin serious?" Kaido growls, low and dangerous, causing everyone nearby to scatter. "That opportunistic, scheming, incorrigible bitch really think that I'd agree to this? Does she really think that one of her pathetic, weak-minded spawn is worthy of _my_ child?!"

With that, he crumples up the envelope and letter and tosses them both into the fire, still steaming with anger. 

_'Linlin?'_ you think, wondering why the name sounds so familiar. Then it hits you like a Thunder Bagua to the gut. _'Big Mom!'_

You've met very few of Kaido's 'associates' -he probably doesn't want your disobedience embarrassing him- but, having grown up around one of the most feared pirate crews in the world, you still know plenty about the big names of the sea. Among this collection of knowledge is how Big Mom likes to make alliances. 

Marrying one of her many, many, many sons could potentially be your ticket off of Onigashima, but you doubt it would be anything like real freedom. You'd just be going under the thumb of one Yonko to the other. You'd still be shackled, just in a different way. 

Despite his words, fear that Father would change his mind and wed you off hits you hard and fast and cold. Life on Onigashima is hard and unhappy... but you still have some power here and, more importantly, you **NEED** to stay. You need to be ready for when Wano's savior arrives in eleven years and you can't do that anywhere else. 

Your father's obvious rage leads the festivities wrapping up faster than they probably would have otherwise. Within an hour, the remains of the dinner feast have been cleaned up and nearly everyone has vanished, leaving you and Kaido alone.

Both of you sit in the awkward, tense silence that is your familial relationship for several agonizingly long moments. Kaido is giving you these strange little side glances; it's like he wants to say something but can't put it into words. You have broken out in a cold sweat, your hands trembling around the cup of tea clutched so tightly that it's starting to crack under the pressure. Swallowing hard, you decide to risk a question.

"Father," you start slowly, mentally preparing to humble yourself if necessary, "am I going to have to ma-"

" **NO!** " he cuts you off immediately, a look of disgust mixing with the remaining rage on his face. "No, never! Especially not to one of _her_ children!"

The sigh of relief you let out is audible, so much so that even Father is surprised. Perhaps it is that surprise that leads to his next, oddly gentle -as much as anything about your father can _ever_ be gentle-, statement. 

"None of Linlin's children are worthy of you and you should never settle for anyone that isn't worthy of you," he grunts. For a brief moment, you almost feel brave enough to ask about your mother... but that passes all to quickly. Then Kaido glances down at the kimono Orochi had given you, still spread out across your knees, and growls, "Burn that thing."

For once, you are more than happy to comply with one of Father's demands. Once in a blue moon, even he can be right.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are nineteen-years-old and you've finally mastered the **Thunder Bagua**. It's taken years of practice, years of training, and years of blood, sweat, broken bones, and tears to do so but somehow it doesn't feel nearly as satisfying as it should.

Father's proud smile, the way he shouts about your accomplishment to everyone who will listen, rubs you the wrong way. He is happy you've learned his technique... and that is the problem, it is **HIS** technique. The same technique he has used to hurt so many people. 

And now you know it too.

So now you're at an impasse with yourself. On the one hand, you need to get as strong as possible so you'll be ready when the day comes -only nine years left- to help Wano's savior defeat Kaido and Orochi and open the country to the rest of the world. But, on the other hand, part of you feels dirty for doing so. 

Logically, you know that a technique is just a technique; theoretically, anyone could use it and it shouldn't mean anything. That does change the fact that using the Thunder Bagua leaves a bad taste in your mouth, like it is an admission that you need your father's help to do anything.

But, like it or not, Kaido **IS** strong; whatever else he may be, that fact was indisputable. 

That war rages inside of you but, as you stare down at your _kanabo_ , you make a decision. 

_'Whatever Kaido is, whatever_ **_I_ ** _am, I can't let it control me,'_ you think. _'Kozuki Oden didn't allow others to decide his destiny and neither will I. If I am truly to be Oden, then I need to do whatever it takes to protect Wano.'_

If only it was that simple though.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are twenty-years-old and you've taken to marking each of the remaining days until the time of the prophecy arrive with a tally mark on one of the empty pages left in the back of Oden's journal. 

Eight years. Ninty-six months. Five-hundred-seventy-two weeks. Two-thousand-nine-hundred-twenty days.

You mark each day and tell yourself that you can survive this wait ever as every tally mark represents the loneliness and despair growing in your own heart. 

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are twenty-one-years-old and there are two new members of the Beast Pirates, pair of siblings. The older one is a girl, fifteen-years-old, with pink-streaked blue hair and a pair of horns that appear natural, which is a bit unusual. Her younger brother is only thirteen with purple hair and a pair of horns built into the hat he always likes to wear.

Part of you wonders if he does this to make his older sister feel better about her horns or if he just wants to match with everyone else.

Despite their young age -too young, you agonize; you desperately want to convince them to leave, to run, and do _anything_ else with their lives aside from following your father. But you also know that isn't possible; after all, in their eyes, Kaido represents absolute strength and, if they follow him, no one would ever hurt them again- the siblings are already making waves among the senior members of the crew due to their Devil Fruits -the Ryu Ryu no Mi, Model: Pachycephalosaurus and Spinosaurus, respectively- and... unique personalities. 

The girl -you don't bother to learn their names just yet; Pitch may still be around and still steadily climbing the ranks but there is no guarantee these two will follow in his footsteps- is brash, overly-confident, and quick-tempered but she is eager to prove herself and quick to learn. She throws herself into combat lessons with anyone she can bully into sparring with her. This includes you, annoyingly enough, and takes you whacking her across the training fields three times in a row to get her to cool it. 

It is this tenacity that Kaido finds amusing, especially once the girl takes up a morning star club as a weapon, despite not really needing it or knowing how to use it. So he has her properly trained and includes her in your sparring sessions at least once a month, much to your frustrations. But despite how irritating you quickly grow to find her, even you have to admit it's hilarious when she latches onto ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria and starts trying to copy the older woman's speech patterns and mannerisms.

Usually quite badly, mostly because the slightest irritation caused her to switch back to her brash, kind of childish personality.

"Sis wants peoples to see her as a fancy lady, even if she is really isn't," the boy, her younger brother, explains to you one day, very clearly exasperated by his sister's antics. He is a fairly quiet boy, sometimes even coming across as meek, and, as little time as you spend around them, you vastly prefer his personality. "But I guess that is okay too. After all, she's looked after me for so long, she deserves to be a little bratty sometimes."

You don't say anything, just give an understanding hum and wonder what it would be like to have an older sibling who'd take care of and protect you. Maybe it would be similar to what being friends with ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria was like? 

Was it having someone to play with?

Was it having someone who would listen to your fears and worries and anxieties? 

But it can't be like that because a real older brother or sister would put you first and ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria could never do that. At the end of the day, her loyalty always is, and always was, to Kaido -the great, terrible figure who freed her from a childhood trapped in the chains of slavery. 

That is how ~~Big Sis Maria~~ Black Maria sees your father and you know that, should they survive, the brother and sister inevitably fall into that same way of thinking too.

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are twenty-three-years-old and you start hearing rumblings of an impressive new rookie with fire powers. 

"Another D, huh?" Kaido notes one morning when he is sober enough to care to glance over the recently delivered newspaper. Maybe it's that state of (somewhat) soberness that causes him to be more interested and even amused. "About damn time. Garp is still kicking around and his brat is still causing trouble for the World Government, but it looks like it's time for the next generation of devils to kick up a storm. This one might be worth keeping an eye on, we could always use the new blood."

You've only been half paying attention to what your father is saying but when he puts the newspaper you can't help but glance over to it. Your eyes catch the headline printed in bold, dark letters.

**The Infamous Fire-Fist, Portgas D. Ace, Strikes Again!**

* * *

So it goes like this:

You are twenty-four-years-old and you start hearing rumors that a pirate crew washed up on Kuri. It piques your curiosity but the scouts that go out to investigate report back that every on-board apparently died and it was just the empty, busted-up ship that washed ashore.

Had Kaido been on Onigashima at the time, he might have ordered the matter investigated further but your father is off who knows where and who knows what so the matter is dropped fairly quickly.

***

So it goes like this:

You are twenty-four-years-old and the sound of fighting draws to out of the woods. You find yourself on the shore of Onigashima where two figures are doing battle, massive pillars of flames climbing into the sky and debrief flying everywhere. The fight goes on and on until, miraculously, one of your father's top subordinates falls. 

***

So it goes like this:

You are twenty-four-years-old and you meet Ace.

**Author's Note:**

> 1) I NEED MORE YAMATO FICS!
> 
> 2) Most of this is based around my own speculation and headcanons that will definitely get thrown out as Wano continues. 
> 
> 3) This is sort of the first part of a three-part story (that was initially intended to be a single story but got too long) which itself is part of a much longer series most focusing on Yamato and Ace.


End file.
